I had happy hour with a very good friend on Friday who always helps me assure myself; sometimes it's needed to hear what you know is true from an outsider. He's very smart, assertive and essentially knows what he is talking about as he is wise beyond his years. Anyway both of us were single a little over a year ago and have now been in successful relationships- him over a year now and me coming up on it in a few months. It's weird to think that a year ago we spent Valentine's Eve together because he was newly dating and I had no one so we did a little pre-celebration together. The year before that we were each other's Valentine's and spent a night out in We-Ho and had a blast, this year we both have serious people to spend it with. It's amazing how time changes everything.
We were discussing our relationships with our guys, with each other. Currently mine is long-distance until April, pause for tears, no no, I am fine. And his is about to go from serious, to really serious as his boyfriend is moving in with him. I asked how he was doing, how they were doing, as our twosome time is a little more spread out these days, because, life. He said they were doing well, it was like they didn't have to think or wonder anymore, he just knew it was it, no second thoughts or feelings. I exclaimed my approval and agreement as I love his boyfriend nearly as much as I love him. He then asked me about mine which is something I talked about ALL-THE-TIME and overshared in the beginning, but have more kept it to myself since. And I unleashed. Everything is fine but long distance is hard, and I am the type of person that justifies EVERY SINGLE THING with a "well I know mine's not as big of deal..." or "he's actually been in serious relationships, whereas I have just dated around..." etc. And my friend broke into those sentences and told me that no matter what style,length or way you are 'dating' someone, it is all relationships (sans one-night stands in my opinion). Everything I went through from my first high school boyfriend until I met current boyfriend all shaped me to who I am, and what I wanted from a man and a relationship. And that made me feel good, because this entire time I was comparing (DON'T DO IT!) myself to everyone else around me thinking that I hadn't had several "serious relationships" like everyone else, whatever that means anyway, right? But when it all comes down to it, ANYTHING you are investing your time, energy, tears, joy, sleepless nights in IS a relationship in itself.
Every day, I learn something new about my boyfriend or myself and our relationship. We've been together coming up on 9 months if you want to be specific. We are VERY different but have many common interests and I think that we are different in the best ways . The long distance part of us has been going for the last month and lasts for another two and to be honest, I have felt that it has brought us closer in an entirely different way, so for that I am very thankful. I am also very thankful for friends to help you with your insight and viewpoint, like I said, I knew that was all true but sometimes, you just need to hear it from someone else.
We were discussing our relationships with our guys, with each other. Currently mine is long-distance until April, pause for tears, no no, I am fine. And his is about to go from serious, to really serious as his boyfriend is moving in with him. I asked how he was doing, how they were doing, as our twosome time is a little more spread out these days, because, life. He said they were doing well, it was like they didn't have to think or wonder anymore, he just knew it was it, no second thoughts or feelings. I exclaimed my approval and agreement as I love his boyfriend nearly as much as I love him. He then asked me about mine which is something I talked about ALL-THE-TIME and overshared in the beginning, but have more kept it to myself since. And I unleashed. Everything is fine but long distance is hard, and I am the type of person that justifies EVERY SINGLE THING with a "well I know mine's not as big of deal..." or "he's actually been in serious relationships, whereas I have just dated around..." etc. And my friend broke into those sentences and told me that no matter what style,length or way you are 'dating' someone, it is all relationships (sans one-night stands in my opinion). Everything I went through from my first high school boyfriend until I met current boyfriend all shaped me to who I am, and what I wanted from a man and a relationship. And that made me feel good, because this entire time I was comparing (DON'T DO IT!) myself to everyone else around me thinking that I hadn't had several "serious relationships" like everyone else, whatever that means anyway, right? But when it all comes down to it, ANYTHING you are investing your time, energy, tears, joy, sleepless nights in IS a relationship in itself.
Every day, I learn something new about my boyfriend or myself and our relationship. We've been together coming up on 9 months if you want to be specific. We are VERY different but have many common interests and I think that we are different in the best ways . The long distance part of us has been going for the last month and lasts for another two and to be honest, I have felt that it has brought us closer in an entirely different way, so for that I am very thankful. I am also very thankful for friends to help you with your insight and viewpoint, like I said, I knew that was all true but sometimes, you just need to hear it from someone else.
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